Jul 18, 2014

"To Be or Not to Be… A Creative Way to Instill Self-Confidence, Discipline, and Fortitude in Your Children"




Looking for something different, beneficial, and fun for your children to do?  Consider community theater!

Taking part in community theater can be a major growth opportunity for children.  Recently participating in a play proved to be a profound experience.  The children involved in the production gained valuable skills in three major areas of life:  self-confidence, discipline, and fortitude.  

Self-Confidence:  
The socio-psychological concept of self-confidence relates to self-assuredness in one's personal judgment, ability, power, etc.

At the beginning of play practices, the actors were involved in several warm-up exercises that proved to be skill-building in terms of confidence.  These activities required the child actors to speak loudly and quickly, to pay close attention to what was going on, and to be deliberate in their actions.  Additionally, the director allowed the actors to have input into developing their characters in the play.  Because of this, it was quickly apparent that all the children, including the shy ones, began trusting their judgment.  The children became more and more confident in their abilities as the director continued to incorporate their suggestions.  The children seemed encouraged and began trusting their abilities even further as practices continued.  All these engaging experiences during practice brought a fun, creative and lightness to confidence-building.  It was really amazing to watch the transformation in the children's self-confidence levels!

Training and control of oneself and one's conduct, usually for personal improvement.


Play practices occurred almost nightly for a few hours during the first part of summer.  This left very little time for typical summer activities including boating, vacationing, etc.  Yet as the play gained momentum and as the children made new friends, the children grew more enthusiastic which in turn correlated with growth in their discipline levels.  The children seemed to realize that they were a part of something bigger than themselves;  their fellow actors depended upon them to be there (if one of the actors missed practice, another actor would have to read his/her lines.)  The children noticed and commented on the impacts of participation levels on their "synergy" with their fellow actors.  This accountability correlated with their discipline.  The children also had opportunities to gain self-discipline as they had to be quiet when other actors were acting and as they had to be patient while waiting to act in their scenes.  Through team and confidence building exercises, and through the interdependence that evolved between the actors, the children developed a strong sense of teamwork and discipline.  Though there were time and social challenges, the amount of self-discipline cultivated in the children was astounding!  

Mental and emotional strength in facing difficulty, adversity, danger, or temptation courageously: 

We had an excellent director.  She was respectfully direct with the children and gave constructive criticism.  After her first initial corrections, and after the children got over the shock and embarrassment, the director would not allow time for self-pity.  Instead she kept working with the children by encouraging and pushing them to keep going.  The children would repeat their scenes over and over and weren't allowed the option of giving up;  they started getting it right and became increasingly proud of themselves.  The children kept plowing ahead and worked through the director's corrections.  The process of constructive feedback, which sometimes was difficult to hear, could have lead to the temptation to give up.  But the children didn't.  The director truly believed in every child's ability to work through their challenges, and it showed.  The children responded very well to her direction.  Additionally, the director taught the children to "stay in character" whenever they made mistakes.  She also taught them to make something out of the mistakes they made.  Through all of these processes, the children persevered.  They discovered that although things didn't always go smoothly, they had the mental and emotional strength to keep going.  The other actors were also very supportive which added to the positive momentum of the children's fortitude.

In sum, the entire theater experience taught the children positive skills for their development, including self-confidence, self-discipline, and fortitude.  The children learned how to speak and act in front of people, including live audiences, which required a lot of self-confidence.  They learned discipline and teamwork through attending and participating in play practices.  They learned fortitude as they learned the importance of forging ahead when they made mistakes, how to make something out of the mistakes they made, and how to take and implement constructive criticism and feedback.  

This is an experience that will undoubtedly change the children for the good.  They will hopefully take these lessons and apply them in their own lives as they mature.  For anyone looking for a creative and fun way to help children gain valuable life skills, get them involved in community theater.  Shakespeare once said, "To be or not to be…"  If your children need help with self-confidence, self- discipline and fortitude, give them the opportunity to "be" and to develop these skills through participating in community theater! 

This article is dedicated to Director Kelli Graves, Stage Manager Ryan Brown, as well as the amazing cast and crew involved in the production of Bob Perry's "The Broken Statue."  Thank you for giving all of the children a safe and encouraging place to grow and to gain valuable life skills!






Feb 6, 2014

Welcome to my Blog!!!


WELCOME TO MY BLOG!!!
I'm glad you found me!!!
                                                
My hope is that by reading my blogs you will gain some useful information in mastering life's problems.  My blog posts will cover a variety of topics, including relationships, marriage, divorce, anxiety, ADHD, conflict, communication, and many more topics.  My writings will also offer some insights into my style as a therapist.  

Please understand I take my work very, very seriously.  When I use humor, keep in mind I am not making light of any past, present, or future client's situation. I work in an extremely stressful profession and I use humor at times to neutralize the somber nature of my work. 

Also, in my blogs, I sometimes give examples of clients' stories with whom I have worked with over the years.  I have taken GREAT CREATIVE LIBERTY, (changing names, gender, ages, story lines, etc.), to protect my clients' privacy. 

So, welcome!!!
p.s.
I am very lucky indeed.  I do what I love and I love what I do.  




Ms. Trotter is a Licensed Marital and Family Therapist in private practice.  She has been conducting therapy with children, adolescents, teens, families, individuals, and couples since 1995. You may now see a therapist from the privacy of your own home if you have a web cam, and a laptop smart phone or tablet. Ms. Trotter is accepting referrals for:

Marriage Counseling
Pre-Marital Counseling
Anger Management
Emotional Regulation
Stress
Anxiety
Depression
Couples' Issues Including Sexual Problems and Infidelity
Co-Parenting with Separating or Divorced Parents
Aging Issues
Infidelity
ADHD
Reconciliation Therapy
Family, Adolescents and Children's issues
LGBT
Communication Issues
Conflict Resolution Difficulties


Ms. Trotter also works with the courts, providing therapeutic support to those involved in a family court case. She has been trained in Family and Divorce Mediation 12 O.S. § 1825, and has specialized in Domestic Abuse and Child Custody Mediation pursuant to 43 O.S. § 107.3. Ms. Trotter is accepting referrals for:

Mediation
Parenting Coordination
Custody Evaluations
Limited Scope Visitation Evaluations
Supervised (Including Therapeutic), Monitored Visitation & Exchanges
Reconciliation Therapy for Estranged Parents & Children
Adoption Home Studies

Visit Ms. Trotter's website at http://www.treytrotter.com for additional information.